So, have you ever suffered from home sickness?
That feeling, when you just want to curl up into a ball and cry until you open your eyes and find yourself back in your own bed, your own house, your parents? School camps, sleepovers, maybe a vacation away for a week. Those times when you should be enjoying the things under your nose, right in front of your face; but all you can think of is what you’re missing at home? I haven’t. Ever.
Until this year.
I was that kid wishing we could stay away for another week, to keep away from the sad reality that is work and school assignments. But something has changed. I didn’t want to get out of bed, I didn’t want to eat anything, I didn’t want to talk to anyone apart from my best friend back home in Australia. Obviously, that wouldn’t be happening any time soon, but I really had no idea how to cheer myself up- I’d never had home sickness. Talk about a year full of firsts, hey?
But I guess, I realised I couldn’t mope for the next 4 months. I couldn’t be the downer in the family, sort of like the big black storm cloud hovering above my family members heads. So I took to facebook from the confines of my bed, and opened up my photo albums. The smiling faces of all the girls and guys who are a big part of my life filled my screen and suddenly I was crying as I flicked through hundreds of pictures; letting all the memories flood back to me. And when I finally stopped crying, which felt like forever by the way, I actually felt better. I emailed my best friend, Genise, told her she needed to pull it together and talk to me more and how much I missed her and that I was counting down the days. I messaged a few people on facebook, got the updates on their lives; too. And then I realised something else.
Nothing had changed with them. My friend Mel, still in love with One Direction. My friend Jayden, still obsessing over music festivals he probably wont buy tickets to. Other girls worrying about boys, their bodies. The boys getting shitty over the fact that their favourite team lost a rugby match. And, strangely, that made me feel better too. It sort of felt like.. how to explain it? Like things at home had stood still, staying exactly the same until I got back- so we could all move on together. And then I was grinning, and the crappy mood I had been in before hand was completely gone. I showered, wiped away my tears and I was done with it. The knot in my stomach was gone, I actually felt refreshed and relaxed, you know? Well, maybe you don’t. But I thought it was quite interesting.
I’m not saying that those 2 hours completely fixed me. That my mind doesn’t flutter back to my friends, and I don’t spend time thinking about them. It just helped. Sort of closure, of some sort? Haha, I don’t know. I hope the people at home think of me, like I think of them, just so I don’t get forgotten. I think the worst thing was during our time in America. We were driving all day, most days, which left a lot of time to think. And thinking was BAD ! Hahaha. I guess now, when it hits me, its a lot less intense. Plus I always have on the beautiful necklace my best friend gave me before I left. And so I’m going to tell you about it ! It’s called a Bone Necklace. The thought of them is a New Zealand tradition, I guess. Mine is sort of in the shape of an infinity sign, which is supposed to symbolise two lives joining together forever.
And when my beautiful friend gave it to me, she said, “so you and I will always be together, like your old life with me will still be there; even when you’re off traveling the world.”
That’s sort of nice, huh? Yeah. I had bracelets made in Cambodia. My favourite colours on one and hers on the other. She received one in the mail a few weeks later, and was kind of confused when she read “KATE” in the material. But mine says “GENISE,” so this way- I guess we both have a material part of each other, as well as that emotional part inside.
That’s the end of this post, because its getting soppy and sad and emotional- ew ! Hahaha, I guess I’m back into my blogging groove now- I just have a few posts to catch you all up on.